Last weekend, Fr. Hilton spoke of the three levels of love, and summarized them as emotion, commitment and sacrifice

As he talked, I could picture all three. Take the first, emotion; two young kids, walking so close that they are in danger of stumbling, paying no attention to the light pole standing in their path. You know, the “we’re in love!” stage, better known as “hormones run amok.” This has been sold as the “real thing” by Hollywood and every magazine at the check-out counter of our supermarkets. This type of immature love burns itself out as suddenly as it ignited, unless it is balanced by restraint, honesty, and is nurtured by common values and goals.

Then the second level: commitment. This is when we take off the rose-colored glasses to look at reality. Of course, deciding to make a commitment works best if we involve God in the process of discernment. In other words: “Lord, is this what You wish me to do with the life You gave me?” should be the first step. The fact that so many marriages end in divorce is a good indication that, all too often, God is not called in to help. The popularity of separate checking accounts, pre-nuptial agreements and civil marriages tells us that many of those who say “I do” are crossing their fingers behind their back and thinking “Maybe.” I know that I sound like a broken record, but when those of my generation were growing up, and divorce was considered a scandal, or did not exist, folks took a very long time before jumping into wedlock. Why? Because marriage was forever and it was not a decision to be taken “in a fever hotter than a pepper sprout,” as Nancy Sinatra sang long ago. Emotions come and go, but commitment remains, and gives to weak human beings the strength to avoid and reject the temptation to fall into adultery.

Then the third step of love: sacrifice. No one likes that, if we did, it would not be a sacrifice, right? As Catholics, we know and love our Saints. We ask for their intercession, and we marvel at the sacrifices they endured for love of God. I know that every time I read the life story of, say, St. Maximilian Kolbe, St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross, St. Damian of Molokai etc., I always think: “I’m glad it’s not me.” And after that I inevitably draw the sad conclusion that “God did not ask me because He knows I’m a chicken and, when all is said and done, I don’t love Him enough.” Only those who love greatly are able to sacrifice greatly.

And that’s a message that our society does not want us to hear. In fact, when Fr. Hilton was preaching about sacrificial love I was thinking about the latest media hissy fit: the Superbowl commercial by Heisman Trophy winner Tim Tebow.
As I write, I do not know if CBS is sticking to its guns and “allow” the Tebow commercial to be aired (for a mere $2 million) or if it will cave in to the pressure of the pro-abortion lobby and cancel it. I hope it will air, but just the fact that someone was willing to spend that kind of money to present a positive message about sacrificial love is so encouraging. Just as the fact that the usual suspects would start howling “propaganda!” “intolerance!” is all too familiar.

Let’s think about that for a moment: what is a commercial if not propaganda? It’s OK to sell beer, nudity, promiscuity, fast cars and I don’t know what else, but it’s not OK to sell goodness? And particularly it is not OK to present the notion of sacrificial love to a nation that has been saturated with messages about selfishness, pleasure, greed? Some of the reasons given for opposing the ad is that “it’s not appropriate for a festive occasion like the Superbowl.” Imagine that. If the story that the Tebows, mother and son, wish to share with us will cause just one woman to reconsider having an abortion, the pro-choice lobby may lose a customer! And if the notion of sacrificial love takes hold, they may lose very many customers. And they can’t abide that.

Well, even if we will not be allowed to see the controversial commercial during Superbowl, we still know that Mrs. Tebow was ready to sacrifice her life in order to give her baby a chance to live. And her son, Tim, is ready to sacrifice the possibility of a lucrative pro-football career, and to bear the scorn of many, in order to stand up for his belief that life is sacred. For that, they deserve our admiration and our respect.

The highest stage of love, sacrifice, is the most difficult, but it is what distinguishes Christianity. By that I don’t mean that only Christians can sacrifice everything for love. I mean that sacrificial love is the basis of our Faith. Jesus Himself gave us that mission when He said: “greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13) Wouldn’t it be great if we could all live these words?